Wagner Writer

Today is Thanksgiving, a time to take a step back and appreciate everything we have. At first, I was having a hard time feeling thankful. I know Kermit and Freddy Krueger endorsed my book. But that just wasn’t enough to get me in the holiday spirit. I mean, converting Kim Jong Un to a pro gay activist was nice, but he’s no Kim Davis.

Fortunately, a handful of new “celebrities” just came forward and proclaimed their love of The Gay Teen’s Guide to Defeating a Siren. Now I feel the gratitude flowing through me!

5 More “Celebrities” Who “Endorsed” My Book

The Pilgrims and Native Americans

It’s Thanksgiving, so let’s start off with those people who made this holiday a reality. I felt incredibly blessed that, instead of reaching for bread or corn or fruits, these hungry people grabbed my book. What an honor!

Pilgrims and Native Americans Like TGTGTDAS

The Kid from The Nightmare Before Christmas

I know it’s no severed head in a box, but my book comes in a close second.

The Nightmare Before Christmas Likes TGTGTDAS

The “I Like Turtles” Kid

After all this time, I didn’t thinks the “I Like Turtles” kid actually liked anything else. And I was all like, “Dude, find some other hobbies.” Well, it finally looks like he has. And I think he made a good choice.

Voldemort

I’m not sure how I feel about this one. Sure, I’m thrilled the greatest evil wizard of all time likes my book. But notice how longingly he’s gazing at it. I know exactly what he’s thinking and it scares me: “I’m going to turn this book into a Horcrux.” Shiver!

Voldemort Likes TGTGTDAS

Kim Davis

My Thanksgiving wish came true! The mega bigot has renounced her awful ways and seen the light. I still think she looks kind of creepy though. No one should be that freakishly happy holding a book. I didn’t even look like that when I held it myself.
(SIDE NOTE: In last week’s post, the most awful person was Kim Jong Un. This week, it’s Kim Davis (yes, she’s more evil than Voldemort). I guess the moral of the story is don’t ever name your child Kim because he/she will become a horrible human being.)

Kim Davis Likes TGTGTDAS

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